Trouble with the Law

Mister! Mister White Man! Can we take a picture?!


A British couple are on holiday in India.  They are spotted by some friendly locals and are invited to share a traditional marijuana chillum.  All goes well until they run into a potential problem- local law enforcement who notice the “Mister White Man.”

Mister White Man (woman) smoking weed with holy yogi encounter some righteous cops

A chillum: a traditional Indian pipe used for smoking Marijuana, similar to a hookah pipe.

Ava:  We went to the world’s biggest religious gathering which is a Hindu festival.  It’s every seven years ad this year it was in Ujain. 

We got there on the train in the morning.  We were the only white people in town.  It was like being “William and Kate.”  Everybody was coming up and touching Jake’s hat and wanted to take pictures of us.  It’s like, “Oh my god, White Man! White Man!”

We’re walking along saw these old Yogi men in their orange gowns and big long dreadlocks.  I got excited and pointed to my own dreadlocks.  “Oh my god!!  You!  Me!  Indian!  Dreadlocks!  Yaaay!!”  One of them invited us to follow him.  “Hey!… come with me.”

So we went with him.  He took us to a temple, I guess?  There were lots of little outside holy spaces.  Temple spaces.  We walked up to this gang, a big group of men.  They all stood up and were like, “Oh oh oh, hello hello, nice to meet you,” and flipped out a blanket for us.  “Oh please sit down, sit down!!”  The holiest man of all the holy men went and made us some chai tea!

“No no no!” we protested.
“No, no… you have to take the tea!  He made you the tea, you have to take the tea!”
So we did.  Best tea ever!

We just sat with all this holy man and his friends passing chillums around (A chillum is a simple, traditional pipe used for smoking marijuana).  They have loads of chillums.  “Pffffff.”  Smoking, passing.  “Pffffff.”  Smoking, passing.  “Pffffff.”  Smoking, passing.  Jake passed out because he’s a lightweight.

And then some police officers came over.  We’re obviously we’re in India, ya know.  We’re getting really stoned.  It’s a bit weird, but it’s a holy festival with a holy man.

The police officers come over and ask, “Hey, can we take a picture with you?!  Mister!  Mister White Man!  Can we take a picture?!”

They didn’t give a shit that we were getting stoned with the holy men, they just wanted a picture with Jake!  They got some good pictures of him in his cowboy hat.  All the guys were saying, “It’s fine, it’s fine, it’s fine,” because we were with the holiest man in town! Like, he chose us to come and smoke with him!  Fucking hell. 

It was just so nice when we left, too.  They asked us, “Uhh… Can you make a donation?  To the temple?”
“Hmmm yeah… here we go.  Alright, how much?
“Ten rupees?”
“Oh, well, we’ll give you like 500 rupees. It’s fine.”

Actually, you’re just really nice people that just wanted to bring us into your culture and share a chillum.

Me:  Sounds like a nice day.
Ava:  Really good day!  I was so fucking baked… fucking hell!


What if you woke up and thought someone was urinating on you?

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